Delivering UPS packages out of U-Haul truck, part 3

The only kind of trooper I like.

Bitch can pull me over any day.

Delivering UPS packages out of U-Haul truck, part 2

While delivering in one of these U-Haul trucks on a NE Texas route toward the end of the day, I was trying to find a house on the major highway in the area surrounding the Texas State Troopers Commercial Truck Inspection Station. One of the troopers noticed me coming toward them and I pulled into the driveway of a house. Luckily, there was someone outside that house who told me where to find the address I was looking for. I had already passed it, so I turned around and went the other direction on the highway, away from the inspection station.

You can guess what comes next. I pull up at the correct house and even before I can clearly get out of the U-Haul, a state trooper is right on the rear bumper, jumping out of his car, hand on his gun, thinking I'm probably a drug trafficker trying to avoid the inspection station.

Once the trooper sees me in my UPS uniform, he will figure out that I'm just delivering packages and trying to find a house. Hell naw, this guy was obviously overexcited since he had run me down from the inspection station, asking why I was trying to avoid the station. Told him I wasn't trying to avoid anything, but was trying to find the right house. I asked him what the hell he thought I was doing anyway!

That really got him going, and this would not be the last time I would be "greeted" by the Texas State Troopers while driving a U-Haul truck for UPS.

One day, I was fortunate to get one of the few U-Haul trucks that was not governed. It would run 90-95 topped out, and during Christmas time every UPS driver is stressed for time amidst increased traffic and extreme package volumes. Normally during non-holidays, deliveries would total about 100-110/day, but would double throughout December. Almost everyday I was pushing against the time limit for returning to the UPS building by 7:30p. Predictably, I'd see the FedEx truck about 20 miles outside of Texarkana and I would run 80-90mph all the way back.

Only once did a Texas State Trooper catch me running 77 on his radar. I was more likely doing 85 when I saw him. That mistake cost me over $100 in the late '80s, which ruined a day's pay.

Delivering UPS packages out of U-Haul truck, part 1

Yes this happens sometimes, especially when more families sent Christmas packages and mail order was king before the internet split parcel delivery among many parcel services. (When I started, FedEx was still up and coming.) In the early and mid-1980s, UPS truck availability was limited. UPS would rent U-Haul trucks to get the packages out on time. It was a love-hate relationship with those trucks.

First, there were no shelves to keep packages from sliding or to put them in sequence for delivery. Imagine moving everything in your garage to one corner, and then needing a pair of pliers. Not fun.

The trick is to load as many packages as possible on the passenger side, deliver them, and then sort again. I hated doing this because it was a time sink — most of the day was spent shifting and sorting packages rather than delivering them. Getting them all there during business hours during holidays made it more difficult. However, the good part of driving a U-Haul truck was its automatic transmission, air-conditioner/heater, and AM/FM radio — three amenities that were never available in UPS's brown trucks.

Hello Holiday Inn — Damn, that was a close call!

At the beginning of my days at UPS, a supervisor was riding along and training me on a delivery route. We were also covering that route for the driver who was on vacation. Holiday Inn turned out to be the first commercial delivery of the day, and at the time, many of these motels had awnings or covered driveways around the front door. I'm nervous as hell trying to remember all the stuff he was throwing at me, and while driving up I'm trying to determine how to park as close to the front door I'll use when delivering the package — "the UPS way."



As I approach the front door, which appeared to have a newly constructed covered driveway that read, "12'2" Clearance." And the UPS truck is 12'6" tall, so you can see the catastrophe unfolding before me.

The supervisor starts screaming, "Stop, stop, you're going to hit the overhead awning!"

I recognized the problem before he'd finished the first "stop" and slammed the brakes, bringing the truck to a dead stop. I thought the supervisor almost cut his skull in half considering how hard he hit the window and flat dash on the passenger side. But at least I didn't get fired. There are no second chances with UPS. One "preventable" accident and you're gone, period.

For the next seventeen years I did not forget about vehicle height, and kept myself off the front page, off of sites like Fark.com, and clear from the police blotter.

Robbin Ridling authors this blog

Before I go further with this blog, I wanted to make it clear that Robbin Ridling writes this blog. I relay the contents to another and he inputs the posts. In fact, to establish a broader google presence, I'll sign each post with my name, 'Robbin Ridling.'

- Robbin Ridling

Trying to learn unfamiliar areas, part 4

How would I know which house the package went to when there are four houses close by and all four mailboxes were unnamed and on one post? This is where a driver's instincts kick in, and when that fails, deductive reasoning and when that fails, an educated guess.


For example, 90% of the time, delivery drivers know what's inside a package. Knowing that, it's a matter of sizing up the house it should go to, and when you think about it, is not hard to figure out.

Say John Jones lives at Route 2 Bx 44, which is among a cluster of house on a hill. John's package is coming from Bass Pro Shops from Springfield, Missouri. Such a package would most likely go to the house with the bass boat sitting in the garage or at the side of the house in plain view from the road.

When you're on the job, the task of finding, verifying, and then delivering the parcel is never too difficult... or too easy.

Trying to learn unfamiliar areas, part 3

I would consistently run into people in public, such as the mall, a sporting event, Wal-Mart, etc., who would say hello to me as if they'd known me all my life. Problem was, I couldn't remember their name for the life of me, so as they greeted me I'd quickly try to remember the address and work backward to their name, hoping to remember. Rarely did that work, although I could remember what their house or business looked like.

Many times when tracing box numbers along an unfamiliar rural route, I would follow the rural mail carrier's route, since they had originally assigned those numbers. I would search for an address only to arrive in a fork in the road or a 4-way stop. Now which way do I go! One of the best tricks is to get out of the delivery truck, and already knowing the tire print of the rural mail carrier (it's there every day at almost every box), and see which way the mail carrier went.

Never underestimate the amount of evidence that can be left on a dirt or desert road. Lots of crimes have been solved in the desert by a truck pulling off the road and into the desert to discard or bury a body. Paved roads give you nothing, unless it's a dirty tire track leading or leaving it.

Trying to learn unfamiliar areas, part 2

I was a cover driver for the first five years; that is, I covered other drivers' routes when they were not on that day or week due to illness or vacation. I went to work every day not knowing exactly whether I'd be working in or out of town, often another county away. I covered much of the rural area of Northeast Texas and some of southwest Arkansas, numbering around 16-20 different routes.

I was lost for the first couple of months, but once I got an accurate county map of the two Texas counties I covered regularly and started plugging in route addresses on different county roads, everything become clear. Some drivers memorized the customers' names but a name is secondary to the address information. Memorizing names would be a waste of time, since the address would remain the same, but the name changes regularly among rental properties, for example. Still, some drivers prided themselves on being able to remember customers' names, but thirty seconds after the package left my hand, I had already forgot your name, but never your address!

Trying to learn unfamiliar areas, part 1

The most misunderstood and uneducated statement a person makes about their hometown or region is, "Yea, I know that area."

Reality sets in quickly when you realize you don't know it like you think you know it. You may know three-fourths of the streets but some start then stop blocks apart as well as the street/housing numbering sequences. In older cities, these sequences are as arbitrary as arguing with the town drunk.

One of the first routes I was assigned during the summer of my first year was confusing. I returned to it after work and retraced it, trying to learn the area better. However, after going around blocks and blocks of streets like a merry-go-round for an hour, I had a dizzy headache which all but erased everything I had learned.

I was asked, "How do you know where someone lives in a rural area, especially when the address reads simply 'RT 2 BX 240'?"

First, you rely on other drivers to get you started if you don't know the area. Second, maps could help, but only if the driver would log the rout numbers and where the box numbers begin and end. But that takes diligence and discipline that a hectic schedule rarely allows. Third, all of the route's information was stored only in memory by most drivers.