Dogs and delivery men: part 9

Linden, Texas was the setting for a potentially embarrassing scene with a small mixed breed dog. I was trying to deliver a package to the carport door of this house, but while the owners had tied the dog up, it was on a really long leash; long enough to cover the entire carport area. I didn't want to use the front door, since it was obvious it was never used and I wanted them to find the package. What to do?

I had to distract, coerce, or deceive the dog, but this mangy, violent mutt looked like it would sacrifice life and limb to protect its precious carport area. By god, I was gonna deliver that package, come hell or high water because I didn't want to come back the next day.

Solution spotted. There was a short iron pipe lying close to the driveway. I could whop the shit out of this dog, leave the package, and be on my way. With the pipe raised high, ready to rain down a blow on the little bastard's head, suddenly someone from inside the house is opening the carport door! I didn't think anyone was home, and had they seen me about to clobber their dog, what was I going to say, "Sorry about caving in your dog's skull, here's your package; good day!"

It was a young teen girl who took the package and didn't say anything. I quickly got the hell out of there, hoping no one else would come out of the house before I peeled out.

As you can see, my encounters with dogs were more comical than terrorizing, but I'm sure you can relate.